You’re invited to join me on my new adventure, something I’m calling my “joy project.” It’s all about writing, birding, walking, and learning – and you can come along with me even if you’re not in Pittsburgh.
Every season for a full year, I’ll walk the trail in parts and pieces and track the birds (and other things) I see on the way. I’m sharing each essay on my Substack page. There’s lots of other great content there, too.
I hope you’ll choose to drop something in the tip jar for “Birding the Rachel Carson Trail” and the many wonderful creatives who share their passions and joys, too.
Yes, I have a summer birthday and don’t you forget it.
You may know I’m a Virgo, but I’m not super mystical about it. However, there are some attributes that seem to ring true.
“…perfectionism and criticism…complex and demanding…can be difficult to live with, but no one can doubt their sincerity…a humanitarian streak…like to make an important contribution to society…preoccupied with health and fitness…they are constantly worried about it…They wonder what it would be like to have their own business.”
“…ambitious and organized…will endure in all activities that require time and a long battle…often find their way to leading positions in large systems that need to be maintained and held organized and strict. Areas that might spark their interest and bring out the best in them are those in writing about history, gathering biographic details on people who once lived…”
Essentially, Virgos like me love “everything that is complicated and in need of fixing…connecting their own inner extremes of beauty and responsibility into one.”
Hmmm. I’ll let you be the judge if that sounds like me.
I had intended to make a list of 50 cool things, or 50 things that I think are cool, for my 50th birthday. But honestly, I think so many things are cool, I don’t even know where to start. Books? Birds? Foods? People? Cities? Heck, I could write a list of 50 cool words, like “syzygy” and “lavaliere” and “coracle.”
Picking the topic of the list is only one problem. Limiting the list to 50 things is the next problem.
Perhaps I’ll save this activity until next year, when I can choose 51 cool things.
Fuji-san rises above Lake Ashi. The torii gate invites you to embrace peace and respect nature.
It’s a big milestone year for us – several notable birthdays, graduations, and celebrating 25 years of being married to my best friend and love of my life. When my son suggested we travel to Japan to honor such a momentous year, we said “hai!”
For the next several months we planned the trip, researched the culture, the food, the history, the sights. I switched my Duolingo course to Japanese and found a tutor online to help me practice. As our departure date neared, we got excited! We packed our bags, prepared to adjust to the time change, and suddenly found ourselves eating egg sandos outside a 711 in Shibuya.
We didn’t just bring home sunscreen, face masks, and Pokemon cards.
Here are three things that I learned – but there are so many more.
The Japanese language doesn’t have a future tense. At first, I wondered how that reflected their culture’s sense of time, or their understanding of their place in the world. If they are very focused on the present, does that make them savor it more? Or are they a seriously YOLO country? Turns out my speculation wasn’t new, but it also wasn’t accurate. Their verbs don’t have a future tense, but they use other words to mark time. It’s so important not to assume things about cultures, or people, but to listen and learn.
It is possible to have clean cities. Yep, it can be done. Japan’s cities are the largest in the world. And they are so incredibly clean. They don’t have trash bins every few feet. YOU are responsible for carrying the waste you create. This made us very thoughtful and aware. One morning I birded along the Kamo River in Kyoto and saw a man cleaning litter from the river. This attitude of cleanliness shows respect for your home, your neighbors, your world. You can do this in your city. We can do this in our city. We don’t need to live in communities with trash everywhere. Start today by cleaning up your own neighborhood.
Gratitude is essential. I knew I would not become fluent in Japanese in six months. But I hoped to learn enough to be polite and respectful. Two essential phrases that I learned and loved using were “itadakimasu” and “gochisosama-deshita.” You say itadakimasu before a meal, and it means something like “I humbly receive this” or “I’m grateful for this food.” After eating, say gochisousama-deshita. Again, it means thank you for this meal. Whenever we said these simple phrases, the servers and staff smiled with delight. We felt happy in return. We began to look forward to these moments before and after meals when we could make someone happy by expressing our thanks, and feel happy in response to their joy!! Even know I can feel myself smiling remembering people’s responses to these simple acts of gratitude.
Words, as we know, have so much power. There’s also a special phrase to thank someone who hosts you at their home, or an inn, or ryokan. When I used it, again people were visibly delighted.
We learned so much from our time in Japan. (Learning vacations are a thing with us). My son described the experience as “paradigm shifting.” I know we will move forward in our lives with these new perspectives guiding us.
Things in Pittsburgh come in threes. Three rivers, three eagles on the city coat of arms, three kids in our family. Each of my kids is in a different stage of their educational journey. My oldest is midway through the traditional four year college experience. My middle just graduated high school. My youngest completed his first year of high school. I know they had a lot of learning moments, good and bad, in the past school year. So I asked them what some of their life lesson moments were, big and small.
The youngest said, “People exaggerate a lot of things. People want to impress others more so they make stuff seem harder than it actually is, or harder than it should be.”
The middle said, “You are the only one who can make a change in yourself. Don’t look to others to change yourself.”
The oldest said, “Going to the gym on a daily basis has helped my social anxiety. When I first went I was so worried people were looking at me. They weren’t. My confidence improved. By the end of the semester, I couldn’t wait to go. It made me more comfortable in uncomfortable situations.”
My kids learned facts and formulas, they wrote essays and read books, they took tests and did homework and all the regular kind of learning. But they also learned some important things about themselves, and about the world around them, that wasn’t spelled out on the syllabus.
I loved asking them this question and then listening to their thoughtful, insightful answers. It showed me how much they are growing. And they offered some great advice that will help me in my daily life. Hopefully their lessons will help you, too.
Every spring, I teach a four week after school writing club at a local elementary school. We read picture books and discuss what makes each book special. Maybe it’s a funny character, a unique setting, interesting vocabulary, or a seriously surprising ending.
Then, the kids write and illustrate their own books.
I’m there to teach the kids about writing. But every week, and every spring, I learn something from these kids.
Jump in. Our after school class is only 1 hour long, so we don’t have time to wait for inspiration to strike. These kids just jump in and start working on an idea right away. They don’t second guess themselves, they just get started.
Go wild. You know that inner voice we have that makes us stop and say ‘that’s a dumb idea?’ These kids don’t listen to that voice. They give themselves the freedom to write anything they want, no matter what the other kids at the table might think.
Dream big. These kids don’t set small goals. Most of them are working on stories at home in addition to what we create in class. And some of these kids are working on stories that are hundreds of chapters long. I’m not exaggerating. I’ve seen the handwritten manuscripts!
If you want to write, and especially if you want to write for kids, give yourself the chance to write like a kid. Write that idea, no matter how random. Let yourself write with abandon. Be free to follow the plot down a strange, unsettling path. And don’t put limits on yourself. You are strong and capable and creative. You can write that book!
We’ve all had those days…weeks…where it seems like nothing is going right. You’re not just pushing a boulder, you’re pushing it uphill in an ice storm. You think maybe you can’t. It’s OK if it feels hard. It’s OK to take breaks. But if it’s something you care about, you have to adjust your grip and keep going. Because maybe you can.
I read around 200 books a year. I read for research, especially if I’m working on a project for a client. I read many books for pleasure, and many books to learn what’s working the market this year. Most of the time, those categories overlap. I read each book thoroughly, but quickly. I need to access lots of books quickly, so I don’t dilly dally. I’m a naturally fast reader, and I am fine with reading hard copies and e-copies. I’m usually reading several books at a time.
For Christmas, my oldest son gave me a book that I’m reading in a completely new way from my usual process. For this book, I have allowed myself to slow down and savored each and every page. There are so many things for me to ponder and discover, I am encouraging myself to only read a few pages each day so I can really prolong my enjoyment of this beautiful work of art.
If you haven’t read nonfiction in awhile, give yourself the gift of reading Tiny Worlds of the Appalachian Mountains, An Artisit’s Journey, by Rosalie Haizlett. Take your time on every page and fall in love with this beautiful and unique ecosystem.
Big news! My wonderful agency, Erin Murphy Literary Agency, is now merged with Aevitas Creative Management. I get to keep working with the incredible Miranda Paul, and I’m excited about our future projects!
